There is a saying in the horse community, and it may even be fair to say in regular society, that one needs to "Get Back On The Horse".
The saying alludes to something having gone wrong in life – an event that has thrown you or taken you down – and that you must get up, brush yourself off, and get back on the horse; get on with life.
While this saying is a bit violent, it is also very poetic. There is no escaping the hardships of life; we all will experience sickness, disappointment, heartache, death, stress, grief—the list is endless. But I find that the hardest battles we are fighting are the ones within ourselves, that we—because of circumstance or society—cannot or will not openly share.
When something public happens, and if you are lucky, you will have a support system—a group of friends who will bring over wine, tell you he was a jerk, wipe your tears, and set you anew. When something private happens, that is an entirely different beast to conquer.
The quiet injuries we take as humans are often the most long-lasting, the most painful, and the hardest to overcome.
On my recent trail ride in Cape Charles, sitting literally atop a horse, I thought about this. In the still moments when I wasn't stressed about the trail or the relentless mayflies, I thought about my own internal battles. I won't share them here, because as I said, they are private. But in that moment, I also realized how small and unremarkable they really are.
I grew up riding horses, and from the age of nine we lived on a beautiful horse farm in Virginia. I learned quickly and from a young age that riding horses gives you an innate sense of control. If for one moment you get distracted, feel fear, let your surroundings dictate your journey, then in all reality you could end up face-first in a pile of *shit. And if THAT is not a powerful metaphor for life, then I don't know what is. *Sorry about the inelegant word but it was necessary.
We all must stay focused on what is ahead and not become distracted by anything else. We all must move forward through what is hard, through what seems unmanageable, much like riding a horse. Often, new riders look at these beautiful beasts and think, "And I'm supposed to tell THAT what to do?" and they are smart to recognize their own insignificance. These animals have thousands of pounds on them; they are unmatched intellectually by others in the animal kingdom, and that powerful brain has a mind of its own. In this way, horses are much like the internal battles we have; they are uncontrollable, large, scary, and to some seemingly impossible to overcome.
But the battle and the beast are also the same in that, with a bit of well-meaning intention, a little effort, work, and trust, they can be brought under control. A beautiful balance can be achieved when you realize you MUST ride it out, trying to carry the horse on your back is simply not an option.
So I'll leave you with this: Nothing in this life is unconquerable other than death. That is it. The stress is off. If you are not facing imminent death, then you can get through this. There is a way, there is a path. And if, for some reason, along the journey, you are thrown again, you will know that all you have to do is get up, brush yourself off and get back on the horse.
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